i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
She announced her abortion via fbk
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
