i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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