Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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