We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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