hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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