when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
