is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
