So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
