Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
