i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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