she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He passed out mid-signature
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
