just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
