can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
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