Apparently you make a good broom.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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