apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
