I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
