Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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