how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
