you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
