How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
