I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize
