We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
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