That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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