Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize