Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
