all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
