she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize