So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
