if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
