U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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