What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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