She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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