i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
