i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
