literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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