Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
