His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize