Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
