i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
