we have officially lost it.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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