I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
