stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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