Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
i believe in u and ur pee
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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