she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
