Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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