i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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