OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
