Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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