No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
