Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize